Sunday, April 18, 2010

I have been left an orphan!

Dad was eaten by a giant bird today!! It's true and now I am left an orphan at tender age of nine. The horror!!!!!!!!

It all started earlier this weekend when I was informed that Dad was leaving on what he called a "business trip to Minnesota." I don't know that means since his business is to stay right here in Orlando and take care of me, but he seemed to have forgotten that. Anyway, there was a lot of packing and preparing and none of it involved taking me along so I was getting a bit upset by the whole situation. I informed him that this behavior would not be tolerated and he better either take me along, or just forget the whole thing. He then proceeded to pat me on the head and take me out of the suitcase saying that I would probably not make it past security. Whatever! I am a doxie ninja. I can be stealthy and my size was made for easy transportability so he was just talking nonsense. But the madness did not stop there and Sunday afternoon Mom left with Dad to this place called the airport.

At the time I was not aware that this airport place is actually the evil nest of a giant bird monster called an airplane. Later when Mom came back alone I was starting to think he had actually gone without me and was getting ready to throw a fit when Mom looked up in the sky and pointed at one of these airplane monsters (apparently we live very close to this airport nest of evil). She said, oh so casually, "there goes Dad in the airplane." I could not believe my floppy ears! Dad was eaten by one of those giant monster birds?!?!?! I looked up at Mom and said, "What is wrong with you woman??? Have you no feelings??? Dad is now a snack for some giant pigeon and we're waving???" It was a very distressing situation as you can imagine. Mom assured me that Dad was fine and would be coming back on Friday, but I don't see how that's possible unless the bird comes back and throws up Dad or something. I have been known to do the same thing when I eat something gross off the street, but since Dad is far from being gross I don't see any hope for him being brought back up by the evil bird. He is a goner.

He was a good dad. He gave me snacks, he took me for walks, he often matched my harness outfit, he patted me on the head, was a good snuggler and we were each others favorites. I loved him very much and I will miss him now that he has been eaten by this airplane bird thingy. I have been left an orphan (I'm not counting Mom because she took him to get eaten and that seems suspicious). I hope this tragedy will act as a lesson to all dad's out there. When your doxie says don't go, or at least take him and his ninja skills along, maybe you'll listen and avoid being eaten by an airplane. I will bark at all birds from now on in your honor big guy!


  1. Don't worry buddy. When it comes back to it's NEST... it will Poop him out. Just wash him off and all will be fine again. I'm just sayin'.

  2. Oh no Flash. The nerve of your mom to let dad be bird seed.
    Hope dad was wearing some warm cloths for when he gets pooped out in Minnesota.
    Love Ruby & Penny

  3. Don't worry! Give it a few days and he'll get regurgitated by the big bird! Usually that process comes complete with presents. :-)

  4. Do not worry and wait for presents. I'm pretty sure there will be presents.

  5. That is veeeerrry suspicious! Why the giant bird monster ate your Dad and not your Mom? Hmmmmm.......

    (((hugs)) your friends
    Oskar, Schatzi & Xena

  6. *sniff* What a sad story. I has never seened a bird like dat. I hope ur daddie comes back soon.
    ~Texas, Bubbles & Pompei